I'm sixty years of age. That's 16 Celsius. ~George Carlin, Brain Droppings, 1997
Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. ~Red Buttons
Our birthdays are feathers in the broad wing of time. ~Jean Paul Richter
We advance in years somewhat in the manner of an invading army in a barren land; the age that we have reached, as the saying goes, we but hold with an outpost, and still keep open communications with the extreme rear and first beginnings of the march. ~Robert Louis Stevenson, "Virginibus Puerisque II," Virginibus Puerisque, 1881
We advance in years somewhat in the manner of an invading army in a barren land; the age that we have reached, as the saying goes, we but hold with an outpost, and still keep open communications with the extreme rear and first beginnings of the march. ~Robert Louis Stevenson, "Virginibus Puerisque II," Virginibus Puerisque, 1881
When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it. ~Mark Twain
Our birthdays are feathers in the broad wing of time. ~Jean Paul Richter
Dad, your guiding hand on my shoulder will remain with me forever. ~Author Unknown

A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. ~Robert Frost
Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act. ~Truman Capote
I don't care how poor a man is; if he has family, he's rich. ~M*A*S*H, Colonel Potter
The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left. ~Jerry M. Wright
Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once. ~Dave Barry, "Your Disintegrating Body," Dave Barry Turns 40, 1990